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>> Heartburn recipes? [topic: previous/next]
PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 11:10 am
dompfa ben


Posts: 409

Sorry, Adam Smile

Your post reminded me (don't ask for the neural pathway on this one) of a game we used to play on the way home from fishing trips in the car. While the idea was to pass the time and keep dad awake, it did make us laugh a lot.

What "combos" would cause the most bone-searing, heart-pounding, mind-blowing heart burn?

There are no hard and fast rules on how to play... you can get creative with this (Chris? I'll bet you have some interesting ideas) or keep it simple. Here's a few examples:

1. 7-Eleven 1/4 lb. Spicy Big Bite, and a Welch's Grape Soda

2. Hostess Raspberry Pie and a 16 oz. Clamato

3. Slim Jim and a Strawberry YooHoo

4. Two Jack-in-the-Box Tacos with Ranch dressing, and a diet Red Bull

5. Blue Gatorade and a McGriddle

6. Anything with a LOT of tarragon...

...you get the idea. If you want to put a holiday or a fish theme on it, that's fine. Have fun.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 12:22 pm
moonshine


Posts: 346

Great recipies for disaster, Ben. I love this game!

Here's the heart and soul of my entry:




The Tijuana Mama, available at most AM/PM/76 petroleum/fine dining franchises.

As if mystery meat wasn't enough of a culinary Matterhorn, the fine folks at Penrose and ConAgra have conspired to bring you this hybrid Frankenstein monster of junk food. Not content with a plastic-encased Weiner, they pickled the darn thing and peppered it, too. Yes folks, it’s the gift that gives TWICE!

What sort of beverage would compliment such a consumable, unholy spawn of Oscar Meyer? I propose this:





A cooled (not iced) cup of mini-mart coffee. Set it on a bait-encrusted pier railing for an hour and wash down coagulated greasy bites of the Tijuana Mama and you will belch flame like the dragon in Fantasmic.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 1:46 pm
fatzmalone


Posts: 45

Daves Insanity Sauce & anything you decide to put it on

This will not only give you massive heartburn, but you

will be one lucky man/woman if you can take a whole

teaspoon of this stuff & not croke.

Trust me on this one, don't try it!!!

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"Never Trust A Skinny Cook"

Fatzmalone...
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 5:04 pm
dompfa ben


Posts: 409

I'm already LMAO... the Tijuana Mama has made me burst into spontaneous laughter twice today already!

That's good stuff!
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 12:23 pm
stripesidechaser


Posts: 655

fatzmalone wrote:
Daves Insanity Sauce & anything you decide to put it on

This will not only give you massive heartburn, but you

will be one lucky man/woman if you can take a whole

teaspoon of this stuff & not croke.

Trust me on this one, don't try it!!!


I had some Dave's at Berkeley to spice up my chili at one of the MMD's. I tried to warn one guy but he told me he ate it all the time. Next thing I knew, his girlfriend told me he was sitting in his chair crying! (Sorry if you're reading this, but it really was funny.)
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 12:49 pm
josh


Posts: 10

Dave's is obscenely hot, but it seems like a different kind of hot. I dump it in just about everything I cook, and don't get heartburn.

Smirnoff ice, that horrible tasting alco-soda, gives me the worst heartburn ever. It just sucks in every conceivable way.

From concentrate lemonade, along with a plate of hot wings, is a pretty destructive combo.
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 10:27 pm
gyt


Posts: 97
Location: Mars

Sulfuric acid. Heart burn every time.
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:04 am
moonshine


Posts: 346

On second thought, if I had a mother from Tijuana, I'd be pretty steamed that they named this gas-stop insult of a pickled sausage after her, especially when I got a chance to see how it looked out of the wrapper. I mean, does this look like your momma (Note: Keep all obvious sophomoric responses to yourself)?




What's next? A Miso-flavored, Kawasaki Mommy sausage? We should be so lucky.

I'm sure that the think tank at ConAgra was working overtime when they came up with this little slice of political correctness:



Check out the graphic- the same on both except for the hat, hair and neckline. Thanks for the effort.

Swell. Now all our mamas are equally insulted.
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:17 pm
baitfish


Posts: 555
Location: St Augustine, FL

Great Idea and I have just the thing but I think the closest Sonic is in Anaheim. They offer the following um...item...

FRITOS® Chili Cheese Wrap

Flour Tortilla filled with FRITOS® chips, Chili, Cheese, Lettuce and Tomato

Top it off with a little... [img]http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/candy-crate_1975_371774310[/img]

And wash it all down with a Jolt Cola and a pack of Pop Rocks!

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:23 pm
eelmaster


Posts: 592

Just about everything gives me heart burn. But, an anchovie omlette with a spicy bloody mary backer is always my down fall. That's why I've stopped eating that combo. Now I just drink bourbon for breakfast and everything is just beautiful.
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:38 pm
dkkim


Posts: 970

Dave's insanity sauce is the bomb! Korean's don't have the highest ratio of stomach cancer for no reason (no source just my opinion). We loooove our spicy food and we usually pay.. the next day.

"4. Two Jack-in-the-Box Tacos with Ranch dressing, and a diet Red Bull "
Don't forget the jalapeno poppers all topped with tabasco or Sriracha sauce!!!!
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 3:23 pm
2d


Posts: 564

You mainlanders don't even know. try the chili spam moco washed down with a liliquoi (passion fruit) milkshake from Cafe 100 in lovely downtown Hilo Hawaii:

2 scoops of rice
multiple slices of fried spam (crispy!!)
a fried egg (sunny side up and runny unless you ask for different)
cover it all with a big scoop of chili
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 12, 2007 8:07 am
baitfish


Posts: 555
Location: St Augustine, FL

How about the deep fried twinkie at the San Diego County Fair.

I also saw a lovely concoction of french fries covered with chili, nacho cheese sauce, sour cream, jalapenos, pickles and ketchup. They should have called it the "Garbage Disposal".

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 12, 2007 8:19 am
eelmaster


Posts: 592

baitfish wrote:
How about the deep fried twinkie at the San Diego County Fair.

I also saw a lovely concoction of french fries covered with chili, nacho cheese sauce, sour cream, jalapenos, pickles and ketchup. They should have called it the "Garbage Disposal".


Or how about deep fried pickles from NC. They also have a pickle marinated in cherry Kool-Aid that's surprisingly not too bad.
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 12, 2007 9:50 am
baitfish


Posts: 555
Location: St Augustine, FL

LOL! I saw that on Alton Brown's Feasting on Asphalt! A Red pickle... mmmmmm
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